Crime Report

At 6 AM this morning, an iPhone mysteriously went missing after its owner snoozed the alarm for the nineteenth time. It wasn't until twenty-seven minutes later when morning light woke Allie O'Malley, teacher at the local middle school. She was relieved that today was an asynchronous Monday, so disruptions to her routine were minimal, and she was able to log in on time. 

"I didn't even set eyes on it--I barely realized it was morning already" she recalls, and her spouse promptly confirmed. He, too, appeared out of sorts from disrupted sleep. 

Rubbing his eyes, he recounted the variety of ring tones she had programmed. "Presto. Radar. Radiate. Also, slow rise." 

"I've had a lot on my plate. So I set a bunch of alarms to make sure I don't oversleep."

"Oh, her phone also plays 'I'll Fly Away' from the Oh Brother, Where Art Thou soundtrack," he added. O'Malley insisted that she's been meaning to update that since the film was released in 2000.

When findmyiphone app yielded no results, police were called onto the scene. They spent the afternoon gathering suspects. Based on the open window on the opposite side of the bed, they have only one.