Day 32

We're not fond of cauliflower in our household. I would eat just about anything, but in no way do I seek out its bland and unusual texture. The fact that my husband, the primary cook of the family, has a serious aversion to it has surely contributed to the boys' avoidance of even trying it, even as it has arrived twice already in our weekly Green Grocer box. I suffer some level of guilt for not setting a better example for them. Try it before you decide that you don't like it. Just look at Sam and his green eggs and ham before you turn your noses up. But the last time it arrived uninvited, we set it aside until it grew subtle bursts of gray mold on its surface. This week, we promptly found it a new home where it would be welcomed and enjoyed.

I recently finished a course on early adolescent development where I read about James Marcia's Theory of Identify Commitments. It appears that our children are still in what Marcia describes as the foreclosed stage. They have simply internalized our commitment against cauliflower, among countless other things we are consciously and unconsciously teaching them. Sometime in the future, we can expect them to explore and experience moratorium, which will likely be accompanied by some distress, especially considering the smell of the vegetable when steamed. Surely, they will eventually reach the achieved level of a identify development, but will they come out on the other side of this tumultuous self-discovery with cauliflower on their plates? It is one of those mysteries that I will watch with anxious anticipation over the next several years. Parenthood is indeed full of adventures.